The color of grief.....

The color of grief.....

Yesterday almost felt like the beginning of spring....trees are starting to bud,  flower bulbs are Starting to peak out of the ground, the sun was shining, almost warm enough without a jacket...the rest of the week we are to expect rain/snow...it is spring by the calendar....We have had our heaviest snows in May after all ....almost time to put away those winter drab colors and get out the colors....

I found some more glass blobs of all colors and threw them out into my gravel landscaping..color....after the brown, gray, black....shiny colors sparkling in the sun...

This week marks my parent's  66th wedding anniversary. Both are gone now..we had celebrations for their 50th and 60th....so much time...so many years, family....love.....

In another two weeks, marks the 2nd anniversary of my husband's passing....where has time gone?....

Milestones, each one...

It just reminded me of color after the winter....winters of our lives.....we mourn...we cry....we hibernate...In nondescript colors of black, brown, gray-ashes...we don't feel and those colors seem to cover up the non feeling...   

At some non-defined point....color begins to seep back into our lives....we see a little green here and there, maybe the blue of the sky, or laughter from somewhere in the distance, we begin to feel, our senses begin to work,...and we see color, maybe dim at first, but there just the same...

It becomes a choice to wander through the colors...see sparkles of life again, wear those colors and feel again,,,away from the black....not that we have forgotten the winter or the loved ones...but spring is approaching...the storms lessen, somewhat...there are still blasts of winter in our feelings,....but maybe not hurricane force....but some of the fog is lifting to see the sunshine,,the rainbows...the colors of other seasons of life....not just the color of grief...

Esther 4:3

New International Version (NIV)

3 In every province to which the edict and order of the king came, there was great mourning among the Jews, with fasting, weeping and wailing. Many lay in sackcloth and ashes.

Psalm 43:2b

......Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by the enemy?

Thank YOU for the beginnings of color, sparkles of light, instead of the greys, browns, black...the spring after the winter, the beginnings of after-mourning ......

"History of mourning clothes/colors, EHow.com

Background

Western civilization has been most responsive to black as the color of mourning. Perhaps no individual more impacted mourning customs than Queen Victoria. Upon the death of Prince Albert in 1861, Queen Victoria donned full mourning dress and continued wearing her "widow's weeds" until her death in 1901.

Custom

Mourning dress was the realm of women. Men were already in black and gray business attire. Not any black fabric was acceptable for mourning. It could have no shine. Crape, a lack-luster, black silk gauze was the predominant fabric. During the 1890s, due to its demand, the Courtaulds used black crape as the foundation of their textile empire.

Full Mourning

The natural grieving time for one deeply loved is two years or more. Mourning dress customs coincided with this timing. In the United Kingdom, during the 1800s, a widow or mother who lost a child wore full mourning for the first one year and one day. Dresses had no adornment, hair was covered with severe bonnets and faces were shielded by crape veils. At times, mothers' dresses had a white lace jabot to symbolize the loss of an innocent child. Mourning was an expression of grief; personal appearance was unimportant.

Half-Mourning

After one year and one day, the next nine months of mourning showed subtle dress changes. Black jet buttons and jewelry, cameos with photos of the lost love, jewelry made from dull coal, and more elaborate black trims and some ruffles were introduced into mourning wardrobes. Hats replaced bonnets. The final months of mourning dress were spent in subdued colors like gray, purple, lilac and steel blue.

Civil War Impact

During the Civil War, as casualties rose between the North and South, mourning wear became the first ready-to-wear fashion. While most clothing was custom or sewn at home during this time, women could not wait to have mourning dresses made. As times worsened during the Civil War, many women began dying their wardrobes black in large, outdoor cauldrons, since the smell of the black dye was too offensive to use indoors.

Passing of Time

World War I brought an erupt end to the length of mourning. Every family was suffering the loss of loved ones. World War II further diminished mourning dress periods. By the 1950s, a half year to one year became the acceptable timetable for mourning wear in the United Kingdom. Today, many Western women believe it is disrespectful and unacceptable to wear any color other than black to funerals and memorial services."

"What Does the Bible Say About Mourning?

By an eHow Contributor

 

What Does the Bible Say About Mourning?

Many people wonder what the Bible has to say about mourning. Mourning is mentioned multiple times in the Bible. Biblical references to mourning say God cares about us when we are in mourning, that He draws close to us and comforts us. According to the Bible, He also expects his followers to comfort others who are in mourning...

Function

Mourning is a way that people heal the pain they experience in life from loss, whether that loss came about through death or choice. Mourning is mentioned multiple times in the Bible. Sometimes mourning is referenced after a death, but often mourning is the reaction of the Israelites as they face the consequences from walking away from God. Mourning can also play a part in reconciling man with God.

Considerations

The Bible recognizes that mourning is a part of life. In Eccl. 3:4, the Bible says, "[there is] a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance..." This passage validates that there are times in life when we need to mourn. However, the passage implies a promise that the time for mourning will end and will be followed by a time to dance."