Entrust....

Entrust....

Okay, last year I wrote about my husband-"forever 67" and now another year has passed since he has died...this year seems to have  gone even more quickly than the years before...with so much activity. 

But even though he has died, there are still many times that I turn to share, to point out and realize that I can't. It is a rude awakening again and again. But, I continue to go on..the ache of aloneness is still there, maybe less than last year and the year before...the ambushes of emotion still hit without rhyme or reason at times....the wish for that partnership that we shared is still strong....especially when I am around others whose marriages are intact....

Reading this Jesus Calling this morning, I admit, was hard...I thought I had entrusted my husband to God....But, His decision was to take him home...not leave him with his family...that wasn't my Plan....I wanted to hold my husband's hand...not God's...

I remember the day of the diagnosis, the tear filled, stricken faces of my children, my father, myself, when the doctor told us the prognosis of my husband, their father, his son in law....it is engraved in my mind..."this can't be happening, not us, that only happens to someone else"...and then the resolution, "move forward, day by day...."  And we did, holding each other and holding on to God's mighty hand....entrusting ......

thank YOU for always being  there to hold us.  Help me to entrust You with each person in my family, knowing that You have the Best in mind for each of us. Help me not to hold them too tightly or too loosely, so that You have full reign in their lives. You work mightily on their behalf....

Jesus calling-August 23

Entrust your loved ones to Me; release them into My protective care. They are much safer with Me than in your clinging hands. If you let a loved one become an idol in your heart, you endanger that one—as well as yourself. Remember the extreme measures I used with Abraham and Isaac. I took Isaac to the very point of death to free Abraham from sonworship. Both Abraham and Isaac suffered terribly because of the father’s undisciplined emotions. I detest idolatry, even in the form of parental love.

When you release loved ones to Me, you are free to cling to My hand. As you entrust others into My care, I am free to shower blessings on them. My Presence will go with them wherever they go, and I will give them rest. This same Presence stays with you, as you relax and place your trust in Me. Watch to see what I will do.

When they reached the place God had told him about, Abraham built an altar there and arranged the wood on it. He bound his son Isaac and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood. Then he reached out his hand and took the knife to slay his son. But the angel of the Lord called out to him from heaven, “Abraham! Abraham!” “Here I am,” he replied. “Do not lay a hand on the boy,” he said. “Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.”
—Genesis 22:9–12

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us…
—Ephesians 3:20

The Lord replied, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”
—Exodus 33:14